Death provides a clear ending point, but what of the sneaky things we mourn? Lamenting lost or missed opportunities, those “if I only would have” moments when we fantasize what our lives would have been like if we had acted or chosen differently. “If I was only (fill in the blank) years younger“, “If I didn’t have kids” (this doesn’t mean we don’t love our children or in any way wish they were gone). “What if” moments, we all have them, so when they come, let them pass with little notice, like a small wave lapping our feet at the waters edge. Do not under any circumstance comment out loud or engage in conversation regarding them. For if we do, what began as a seemingly benign chat will devolve into morbid reflection, pulling us out of the moment and into a destructive contemplation of the past. Profit from your experiences, use them as teaching instruments for you and more importantly others, but do not dwell on them, for any reason. “We do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it” for one of life’s great truths is that “Pain is the only instrument sharp enough to cut away the excess of self.”
When we know, who walks beside us, on this path we have chosen, our fears fall from us.
Monday, September 9, 2013
Mourning Becomes Destructive
Death provides a clear ending point, but what of the sneaky things we mourn? Lamenting lost or missed opportunities, those “if I only would have” moments when we fantasize what our lives would have been like if we had acted or chosen differently. “If I was only (fill in the blank) years younger“, “If I didn’t have kids” (this doesn’t mean we don’t love our children or in any way wish they were gone). “What if” moments, we all have them, so when they come, let them pass with little notice, like a small wave lapping our feet at the waters edge. Do not under any circumstance comment out loud or engage in conversation regarding them. For if we do, what began as a seemingly benign chat will devolve into morbid reflection, pulling us out of the moment and into a destructive contemplation of the past. Profit from your experiences, use them as teaching instruments for you and more importantly others, but do not dwell on them, for any reason. “We do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it” for one of life’s great truths is that “Pain is the only instrument sharp enough to cut away the excess of self.”
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