RECIPE FOR NO GROWTH

Watch for trends and as soon as a new one starts, jump on board. It doesn’t matter whether or not the trend appeals to you, just that you follow it as soon as possible, since you must be on the cutting edge. Be the first to read the latest self help book and waste no time in telling everyone how life changing it is, of course always with an ear to the ground for the next book. Be sure to belittle and condescending to those who don’t share your beliefs, even if you aren’t sure what they are this week, since you know in your heart of hearts that they really are against you and will pull you down if given the chance.  Become a master of the backhanded compliment, point out the faults of absent “friends” or anyone you perceive as more successful than you since your wit demands to be shared and appreciated. Always have the answer, never mind those pesky details or facts. And above all crow endlessly on your ability to always get the best price. Let your pride shine brightly when recounting how you always get the best deal, how you are a master of the cheap. Keep up appearances at all costs, standing proudly on your dignity because clearly you are the master of your life, having all the answers, no spiritual assistance needed or required.