As 2020 comes to an end; a most curious year indeed, I find, like many, reflecting has captured my attention. For me not so much the last year, but life in general. When I was born there was but a single satellite in the night sky, the moon. Much has changed since then, some good, some not so much. I have witnessed the best we can be, one to another, as well as the depths of selfishness; the eyes of the individual in both cases having looked back at me from my mirror at times in my life. I have lived a life amazing, taken the road less traveled and learned much, often the hard way. Regrets? Of course, but what piece, what lesson, could I leave out or change and still be me? My scars, seen and unseen, are well won and all mine. A roadmap of a life lived, lessons learned and owned, of costs accrued paid for in spiritual coin.
Odds are there are more days behind me than ahead, and if this year finds me somersaulting into eternity, I will do so giggling, for I have lived. I have created from the heart, I have sung and danced with voices eternal, introduced to them through the most unlovely of avenues, addiction, meeting them on this lifelong path of freedom from this most terrible adversary. I am a Man today, and all that represents. I have seen the depths of human despair and heights of liberation, often sitting side by side. I have laughed and cried from the heart with many, almost always alone. And I have loved, and I guess I do have a single regret, that I would have been more open to those who have loved me along the way. Such is life.
Do not die with your music still in you, be of service and live-in purpose, smile in the face of fear for fear is a bluffer and a liar. And here come the “ands”. And laugh. The adversary hates laughter, and aren’t you really the funniest person you know? And don’t wait, if you owe an amends, make it. If you haven’t told someone you care about how you feel, do it. And embrace those who walk with you, honor you in truth and Spirit and release those who don’t, with love. And free yourself from anger, there is no such thing as a justified resentment, they are all poison. I have heard it said that anger is one of the dubious luxuries of normal men, well who the hell is “normal” anyway, everyone is a bit twisted in their own way, some just more pretzelly than others (that mirror comes to mind again).
Through the crucible of introspection and Love I have learned to be true to my heart, to follow the still, but ever insistent, quiet voice that is God, and though often trembling continue to step out in faith a day at a time until my inevitable somersault into the heart of all that is and ever has been, sticking the landing in the next chapter. Oh, and go hiking, really, you will thank me later. Blessings to you and yours in 2021.
© Vincent Lee Jones Living In Spirit All Rights Reserved
