I never wanted to shop at Walmart. I wasn’t “opposed” to
Walmart as some of my more enlightened (i.e. liberal) friends were, some even
going as far as placing boycott stickers on their vehicles when Walmart first
came to our berg, positioned with care right next to the regulation Greenpeace,
Save Tibet and Make Love Not War messages.
I looked at Walmart as a necessary thing for those who
“needed” it; those unfortunate financially challenged souls who needed
ubiquitous cut rate pricing on everything.
That first time I ventured in it felt like that first day
back in High School trying to find my locker. People were pushing around carts
filled with groceries, clothes, shoes, ammunition and Hello Kitty dolls. I
nearly went catatonic. You don’t put those things in the same cart; it is not
done! It is like having Amy Grant and TSOL in rotation on the ipod or listening
to Rush Limbaugh at the DNC. Shoes are purchased at a shoe store and clothes at
places that do not have frozen food aisles for God’s sake!
I was in shock, my decades long notions of purchasing
etiquette were being assaulted at the most basic sacrosanct levels but then I
began noticing the pricing. Slowly my vision cleared, my roiling stomach
forgotten, the reality of a full cart versus a couple of puny bags became
evident as I began to make my way around. Pet food next to truck tires, frozen
food across the aisle from casual women’s wear, packaged goods merged into pots
and pans than watches to electronics and back to vegetables. I was in a
whirlwind of pricing, 50” plasma TV’s for how much? My finicky cat’s favorite
food half the price I had been paying, affordable vitamins and supplements? I
was hooked.
Soon I lost my fear of being seen by someone I knew, for
just like bumping into them in traffic court you are both there for the same
reason. In time I began smiling at my fellow Walmart travelers, and though most
keep their heads down avoiding eye contact I don’t mind. I now drive an older
Toyota with fading paint, the BMW long gone. Today the tires are pretty good
but I did drive around for 6 months on dangerously worn ones lacking the money
for replacements. It’s been a few weeks but I still have a wave of peace roll
over me when I see those tires, who knew a little rubber could be connected to
serenity?
Now that I am a Walmart veteran, the newbies are cute to
watch, their furtive glances and uncomfortable body language very familiar. My
decision initially to shop at Walmart was made out of simple economic
necessity, I could continue shopping at my upscale local grocer and do without
or switch to the much-maligned Walmart and stretch my purchasing power. The
life lesson though was unexpected. Believing I was this open-minded, freethinking,
enlightened non-judgmental caring individual when I was forced by economics to
adjust my lifestyle some uncomfortable personal truths became evident. My world view had been arrogant and condescending though I would have argued the
point vociferously with anyone who would have suggested it at the time. But
there it was. We only know what we know when we know it. Our perceptions
colored and limited by what we choose to read/watch/listen to but even
more directly by those whom we habitually associate with and the circles we
travel in.
Being in the third act of my life I am at a place I thought
I would never be financially. Life’s lessons do not come neatly packaged devoid
of emotion, both positive and negative. A wise man said to me years ago “ pain
is the only instrument sharp enough to cut away the excess of self.” So if we pass in the frozen food/sporting
goods aisle I will smile and leave it up to you to strike up a conversation and
if I think you are ready I will tell you about the discount grocery I’m
grateful I found on the other side of the tracks that makes Walmart look
absolutely Beverly Hills. Onwards through the fog.
