Autism, Addiction and Me

I was born in 1955. Way back then there were basically 3 types of “kids”: just the regular let’s play hide-an-seek, build a fort, throw rocks, ride bikes, ring doorbells and run, make random calls and ask if “Ben Dover” was home (caller ID ruined that), get muddy, mercurochromed bloody knees and elbows, be home by dinner time kind. Then there were the “weird” kids. Now, this class broke down into the “weird” in an eccentric kinda way which made you kinda cool and then there were the “stay away from little Johnny” kinda weird which wasn’t so good, and everybody had at least one friend who fit the former and knew one of the latter. Today the latter generally hold elective office or work at the DMV.

Finally, there were the “special” kids (special being the term used in polite company). Now, I know a lot about this class, for you see, I’m a member. As a child I struggled to “fit in,” be “just one of the kids” and I lived in terror (strong word but completely accurate) of the “short bus” which transported them to school and home again. My generation pretty much walked to and from school. The only time a parent picked up their child was if they were injured beyond the school nurse’s ability to patch them up or they were sick, projectile vomiting kinda sick or did something REALLY BAD, like invade Poland. So, every day when the short bus would pass me, twice, I would freeze up inside, deathly afraid of being found out. I was seven when I first began considering suicide.

I was adopted at six weeks of age and unbeknownst to my new parents, I was “special” as well as being a sickly child; my heart stopping more than once before I was 9. As a result, my father felt cheated out of the son he envisioned having, and though I supposed he tried, it was abundantly clear he would have traded me in for a different model if given the chance. Mom was Mom. I could have been on death row, guilty as sin, and she would have been there patting me on the arm saying, “its OK honey, the Governor will call since I know in my heart you are a good boy.” But I couldn’t talk her or anyone about what I was feeling and experiencing, hell, I couldn’t even put it into words for myself.

I didn’t know why I was different, but it was clear I was. I would watch the interactions of my playmates, confounded as to the ways they related and responded to each other, and they did it so effortlessly. I’d hang in the background, try to be a part of without really being noticed, especially for the wrong reasons. And I watched a lot of TV looking for clues.

I had a hard time making and keeping eye contact and would often look off to the side when talking to someone. I would say “inappropriate” things (not like bad language or such, well, OK, sometimes, my mind just makes connections which make perfect sense to me, others, not so much) and had no clue as to why they were inappropriate. I would get that hated scrunched up nose narrowed eyed “say what” look and know I had somehow messed up. 

In the early 60’s IQ tests were the rage. When the sealed envelopes with the results were handed out in my class, everyone got a white envelope, well almost everyone, mine was manila in color. That day’s walk home was filled with thoughts of suicide and ways to do it because I knew this was it. I left the envelope on the kitchen table (the thought never crossed my mind to disappear it) and waited in my room resigned to my fate. When Mom opened it all it said was the school wanted them to make an appointment to come in for a conference. My Dad was pissed (yep, that is the word he used) because he would have to take off work and was sure I had done something I was covering up. I maintained ignorance, thankful for the reprieve, dreading what I thought I KNEW was coming. The day came and I attended the meeting with the Vice-Principal as well. They were told I was, wait for it, ABNORMALLY intelligent. I don’t know what else was said after that, for I had shut down and blanked out. It was in the car driving home when I came back around to my father saying, “that was a huge waste of time.” I waited for “the” talk I had been dreading, but it never materialized. I went to school the next day as if nothing had happened and it was never brought up again. I really don’t know why they had my parents come in, this was before GATE or programs for gifted students existed, I think they were just as perplexed at what to do with me as I was.

At a very early age I decided the best course of action was to try to “fit in,” so I dedicated myself to mimicry. I would surreptitiously watch you: your facial expressions, the tone of your voice, the words you chose, how others reacted to you and how you reciprocated. And I practiced and practiced. You know how people say they have done something a “thousand” times? From that point (around 7) through High School I spent thousands of hours in front of the bathroom mirror rehearsing the things that came so naturally to you, until it became second nature. I taught myself to “fit in,” to act as if, even though I didn’t understand the underlying why’s.

And life went on. I looked at what generally qualified as “normal” (not surprisingly a lot of that came from TV) and started checking off the boxes. In time my fear of being “found out” diminished, but I was still a little “weird” which was kinda OK in High School. I played sports, got a girlfriend (relationships took my acting to a whole new level, and I still sucked at them), had a small circle of friends and was bored out of my mind. I drove my teachers to distraction by rarely turning in homework but acing tests. My poor mother on numerous occasions had to fight with instructors to pass me. I wouldn’t have graduated High School if not for her. She was 5’1 & ¾" as she would often proudly state and maybe 110 pounds soaking wet. One her favorite momisims was “dynamite and poison come in small packages,” she was a force to be reckoned with. 

What really made High School tolerable though were the drugs and alcohol. See, if you were loaded or drunk you were expected to say and do inappropriate things. It would be forgiven with the blanket, “oh, he is just f#%ked up.” Talk about a get out of jail free card. As you can well imagine, drugs and alcohol became constant companions and close personal friends. Time passed and I kept checking off boxes: I got married (poor girl), bought a house, became a father and had the beginnings of a career in business management, because that is what “normal” life looked like, right? Things were good, at least I thought so, right up until they weren’t. My reliance on intoxicants turned on me and I ended up out of control, alone, broke, in dire straits physically and mentally. Then at 30 years of age I sought help and have been free of active addiction since 1985.

When I first I entered the community of recovery I was amazed. They talked about secrets and being “the actor,” of hidden feelings and motivations, lies and destructive behaviors. I felt like I was home at last and I let my guard down a little. Though I am still a part of this community, this feeling lasted only a couple of years until I had to face the truth, though I had much in common, I was still “special” and proceeded to work to “fit in” once again.

You see, I’m Autistic and all that implies. Hyper focus, given to routine, poor socialization skills, difficulty in forming and maintaining relationships, the whole eye contact thing (I have been practicing that for over 55 years and I still get it wrong) and so on. I am “high functioning” with (if you believe the tests) a high IQ. Sounds good, but to me it’s like being the car in the junkyard with the best paint job and good tires. I know, I know, just stop it. You must admit though it is a pretty good line. Shhh…just between you and me, the whole IQ testing thing, today I am pretty sure all it really denotes is someone who takes IQ tests well. Just sayin.

There used to be a thing called Asperger Syndrome, which pretty much described me. It is not a thing anymore though, which kinda sucks cause Asperger sounds like you’re having a burger made from snake and only real men eat snake burgers, I could see John Wayne or Errol Flynn eating a snake burger and liking it (remember, born in 55). 

It wasn’t until President Kennedy came to office that the approach to mental health and how we address and work with children who are “special” began to change. In the ensuing decades a new world of resources and understanding has emerged, and had I been born a decade or so later, my life probably would have had a very different trajectory.

There are myriad of ways we can be defined, if we allow it. I am not DISabled; I am just other abled. I see the world through a prism of colors, sounds and textures different than you, not a good thing or a bad thing, it just is what it is. On the upside, having studied people’s expressions (micro and macro), vocal inflections, body language, etc. since I was a small child, I have an uncanny ability for “reading” people and predicting behavior, especially those who suffer from addiction. 

Today, maybe it has to do with getting older, but I don’t care anymore about “fitting in,” I want to spend the rest of my days free of the fear-based restrictions I placed on myself and be honest. I met a young man recently who was Autistic, I asked him how he was coping with life and fitting in. You know what he said? “Screw’em.  If they don’t like me for who I am, I don’t want them in my life.” I cried. 

We all have gifts and talents, are part of the grand fabric of life, the tapestry of colors truly a wonder. All here to teach and be taught, no one without or lacking value. Today I see the world through a new pair of glasses and though the music in my mind is somewhat different from yours, it is all part of the great symphony, every note of value, even those off key for they provide the impetus for change and growth. The key is, and always has been, love, and from love acceptance and respect. 

So, if we ever meet in the “real” world, whatever that is, I may say something a little off key or be a little too blunt, but don’t take it personally. Oh, and I am told I can be a little intense so there is that. It is just me, being me, no longer in hiding, and chances are excellent I will probably say something that will make you laugh and though I don’t own a 1949 Buick Roadmaster convertible I am an excellent driver.

Miracles And A Flat Earth

MIRACLE n. 1. An act or event that seems to transcend or contradict all known natural or scientific laws and is usually thought to be supernatural in origin. 2. Any wonderful or amazing thing, fact, or event; a wonder.

God does not break cosmic law. The laws of retribution, of unintended consequence, of reaping and sowing, of attraction, of intention, of gravity, and like begets like are never broken or contradicted. Our limited (human) ability to comprehend may leave us with the impression that miracles seemingly break these laws, but this is false. What happens is that by raising ones consciousness into His presence a higher law is tapped, transcending the lower. In the secular sense think of it as appealing a judgment from a lower court to a higher, if a judgment is reversed, the reversal is based on some missed, overlooked or ignored precedent, not a rewriting of the code (at least that is how it is supposed to work).  Secular appeals progress through the system, ultimately arriving at the court of final appeal, the Supreme Court. Supreme Court decisions, since it is populated with humans who can be and often are contradictory in their actions and thinking, can be arbitrary in interpreting secular law, God is not. Cosmic law is applied equally, for God does not, cannot play favorites, His Love abundant and equally weighed to all His children.

Not all that long ago the accepted orthodoxy was that the earth was flat and the center of the universe and anyone who disagreed branded a heretic, suffering greatly for voicing a dissenting view. Yet regardless of how many times the accepted orthodoxy has been shown in error, every age continues to believe they have the answers, the laws of the universe understood, humankind's hubris on display. Years from now our future selves will look back on this time in much the same way we look back on those "scientific laws" that held the earth was flat or man would never fly or stand on the moon, with the same incredulity.

Without miracles, our appeal to higher law, how could there be faith? The performing of miracles demonstrates a level of our Fathers love and law, that here to fore had not been known or can be scientifically quantified with our limited human mind. Miracles can, have and do happen, a higher law beyond our limited understanding accessed, the supernatural transcending the natural. No? How’s that whole flat earth thing working out?




 ACIM, Alanon, Baba Ram Dass, Emmet Fox, metaphysics, ODAAT, Sober Living By The Sea

Day 5 Of The 7 Day Diet

…God is love; and he that dwells in love dwells in God, and God in him (1 John 4:16). Day 5: Today, attempt to greet everyone, and view everything through the prism of love. This begins by greeting all with a smile. You will not do this perfectly, no one but a saint could, the purpose is to be aware of love, experience the truly limitless capacity we have for it, to both give and receive. Observe how those whom you meet respond when you greet them with love and how your thoughts are altered when a situation or a bit of news is viewed through the prism of love. The path of love is the straight gate and the shortest way to the Great Goal, to live on the Spiritual Basis one day at a time for eternity. Oh, and you are keeping this to yourself for the next couple of days, right?

Resigning From The Debate Team

God is not just truthful or brings truth but is Absolute Truth itself. Once we begin living on the Spiritual Basis, God translates from the relative to the Absolute, He is either everything or else He is nothing, there remains no middle ground. All those dinner table and coffee shop debates, though well intended, lose all significance for now we know, we are either all in or all out. Having made the decision to turn our will and lives over to the care and direction of God, fear is supplanted by trust and faith. In the light of Absolute Truth we pause when doubtful “…and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day Thy will be done.” To know the truth about any condition heals it, “And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free” (John 8:32).

Love And Itchy Teeth

When we express love we express our true essence, God. Think of how you feel when you express love or when love is expressed to you. In those moments we are in communion with God, in conscious contact. …God is love; and he that dwells in love dwells in God, and God in him (1 John 4:16). A bedrock truth of living is a sufficient expression of love will erase any problem or difficulty. “Where there is fear there cannot be love. The best way to rid yourself of fear is to realize divine Love” for “Divine love never fails…” Are not all of our problems fears based? Are we not driven by the fear that we will either not receive something we think we need or lose something we have? Isn’t worry just a five letter word for fear?

The Great Carpenter taught that we cannot serve two masters, so where we place our focus, regardless and sometimes in spite of current circumstances, is the key. Are we focusing on the fear (the world) or on the spiritual (God)? “To realize God as Love is the remedy for fear.” Though cute acronyms typically make my teeth itch, this one has some value: FEAR-False Evidence Appearing Real. God is either everything or else He is nothing, no middle ground, the thoughts we entertain habitually will be expressed in our lives and the choice is always ours. What will we choose to express today, fear or faith? Remember “Where there is fear there cannot be love” that “There is no condition that enough Love will not heal.” By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one to another (John 13:35).

The One True Answer

        As we live and learn, practicing our new way of life; Living on the Spiritual Basis, not only our perspective but our actions begin to change naturally. We begin to act from love, from God. Less and less do we see the world through the prism of the carnal, secular mind. Viewing existence through a new pair of glasses, we have begun to experience life connected to Source instead of at odds with it. As our consciousness grows and expands the truth of the power of love becomes more apparent. Love is God, God is love and love is always the answer. Through the process of Living on the Spiritual Basis we have established a conscious contact with God, so when faced with any difficulty, problem or trouble the realization of God’s love and Divine presence will not only solve or correct the situation but remove it. Clearly this new way of living develops over time, so if our first thought is not always about God, do not be discouraged. When we become aware that we haven’t yet turned to God in a particular instance, we do so as soon as the awareness surfaces, and be gentle, under no circumstance do we allow our internal dialogue to turn negative. This is not a race, we are already in eternity and negative thoughts about our progress are always counter productive.

Piercing Ourself With Sorrow

       Who has not heard, or some variation of, the quote: For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows (1 Timothy 6:10). Well, at least the first part anyway. Consider how many “successful” people throughout history have attempted to translate wealth into a position of power, to impress their will on others because of the false belief that financial success equals spiritual/life success. The supposed entitlement that wealth conveys unfortunately builds a barrier to enlightenment that often becomes insurmountable. To be clear: money is not the problem, the love of it is.

      If our definition of success is based solely on possessions and wealth, we will have “gained the world but lost ourselves”, remember, he who dies with the most toys still dies and as much as we may wish to, we can’t take it with us. Many have tried and all have failed, we find them, disinter them and then parade them and their cherished possessions about, kind of creepy if we really stop and think about it, this grave robbing. Clearly it didn’t work out so well for them, did it? Additionally we all know or know of a family torn apart over an inheritance, money trumping love and family.

      Living on the Spiritual Basis we learn to use money as the tool it truly is, to live well, enjoy life and praise God through our actions, demonstrating the path in every arena. God wants all His children to be happy, joyous and free and if we have been blessed with substantial resources, we seek ways to help others, preferably anonymously. For in this way we steer clear of the trap of love of money and avoid piercing ourselves through with many sorrows.

The Way Of The Tyrant

          Living by spiritual principles is not easy, no news flash there, and unfortunately many that do disagree on the path. Constructive conversation in congenial tones, on any topic, should be sought; unfortunately many are incapable of this. Their beliefs fall into the “my way or the highway” school of judgment, raised to Sacred Cow status, which leaves no room whatsoever for conversation, let alone congeniality. Spiritually, the “either get it my way or burn” club are individuals who have fallen prey to the temptation to exercise personal power over others. To make them toe the line, even to use others to advance their personal agenda, all for the greater good of course, the indelicate machinations of politicians notwithstanding, history is rife with those who may have started out with noble ideals but then began to believe their own press and (often unconsciously) placed themselves on the pedestal of “I know better” transforming from teacher to leader to tyrant.

Tyrant: 1. Absolute ruler: an absolute ruler who exercises power cruelly and unjustly 
2.  Authoritarian person: somebody who exercises authority unjustly and oppressively. 

      To avoid this temptation is simple but not easy. It begins, and ends, with the absolute truth that all are equal in God’s eyes. The opening words of the Lord's Prayer,“Our Father” , states without doubt our relationship with Him who has all knowledge and power, all equally loved, the opportunity to live on the Spiritual Basis open to all, the key to freedom from this ignoble sin. When we look down on or speak derisively to or about anyone we open the door to the tyranny of spirit, hiding behind the straw man sentiment of “it’s for their own good.” To be free, we must salute their innate spirituality, recognizing the nobility of their spirit even though they are incapable of reciprocation.

     We never shrink when confronted by tyrants, we stand firm, stating our belief with clarity and tact, resisting the temptation to reply in kind or worse, seek compromise using mollification of our belief as a method of avoiding the necessary confrontation. Tyrants only view this as weakness, our failure to stand strong in faith providing them license. An individuals demonstration belongs only to them, for all reap as they sow. Living on the Spiritual Basis we stand and deliver; without judgment or rancor, for flesh is ephemeral, the soul eternal. We will all fall short of this ideal, for such is the nature of being human, so we must always be gentle when dealing with ourselves, profiting from all experiences, sharing openly and honestly our highs and lows, successes and failures. Remember: liking or agreeing with someone is not a requisite for saluting their innate spirituality; it is our ultimate responsibility to one another as children of a loving God. In living this way we remain free of the temptation to exercise personal power over others.

Pure Of Heart, The Pebbles Path

The concept of a pure heart can be troubling, unless we possess the spiritual key. Once a heart has been touched by loss, sin, suffering of any kind, is it possible for that heart to ever truly be pure again? Some misguided souls would have us believe that it can't be, fortunately for “His” children, which in truth is all of us, this belief is false. Living on the Spiritual Basis we have learned that everything and everyone is connected. Every choice, decision and action having significance, from the seemingly mundane to the monumental, affecting not only ourselves but the entire world in the same manner as a pebble dropped in a pond.

When a pebble is dropped into a still pond the surface ripples emanate out in all directions, rebounding to eventually touch every shore. But what of the unseen ripples? As the pebble slips from sight, it’s journey continuing to the bed of the pond, it sends out unseen waves touching every aspect and every creature in and of the pond.

To be pure in heart is to know the pebbles path, aware of our true relationship with “Our Father." This new awareness, this filter for the issues of our heart, when intelligently used blesses us and all our brothers and sisters, for we now “see God” in everything and everyone, our true connection in Spirit revealed, saluting our innate spirituality, regardless of station or circumstances. Our pebble is our consciousness falling through an eternal, infinite pool, touching all and being touched by all, the pool nothing less than God's love and knowledge, purity personified. Our raised awareness cleansing us, renewing us as we travel through eternity hand in hand with our Father.

The Zen of Bacon Avocado Cheeseburgers

We have decided to make a change in our lives. Perhaps it is quitting smoking. We throw away our smokes (or smoke them up) and announce we are now a non-smoker. What changed? If I just polished off a bacon avocado cheeseburger and then announce myself a vegetarian, am I? If I have a room full of exercise equipment or paid up gym membership does it mean I am physically fit? The question is demonstration versus intention. Our intentions may be noble, but nothing happens until we take action and follow through. The question is: what course of action should we follow to be successful.

Change is a process; the new man is not born in a day. Wayne Dyer writes in The Power Of Intention: When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change. Embrace this spiritual truth and think from the end. While still smoking, see yourself free of cigarettes, not as someone “trying” to quit. You have either quit or you haven’t, trying is destined to fail for who wants to “try” hard things like quitting smoking when there are easy things like smoking. If you are persistent, soon the smoke free “new man” (or woman) you have built in your consciousness will emerge and you will be free of cigarettes. You did not quit smoking; you simply outgrew it. Think of it this way: when children we did not know that the last time we played hide and seek or made mud pies or built a fort was the last time, it just was. We could have made more pies or forts or organized a round of hide and seek, but we didn’t and we didn’t think about it, it just happened naturally, part of growing up, without thought on our part.

If getting fit is the desire, do not start by making “deals” with yourself or picking a time or date to start. Instead, before the first sit-up or minute on the elliptical, start by seeing yourself exercising in your minds eye, visualize yourself exercising everyday; picture your body as it will look after exercise, do this every day, throughout the day. Soon the urge to exercise will become overwhelming, as long as you refrain from negative out picturing (if 50 you will never look 20 again) and defeatist thinking (how hard it will be, pain, etc).

Train yourself to think from the end. Like any new activity, at first it will feel clumsy and unfamiliar. If you persist, it will become second nature, like riding a bike. Intention is the vision; you must provide the conditions within your consciousness for the ultimate success of your demonstration.

Oh, bacon avocado cheeseburgers? Don’t be silly; they are the food of the Gods.

Good For What A.I.L.s You

The path of enlightenment asks us “to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God’ with the proviso “as we understand Him.” This phrase is pivotal to the process, so the student must not take the easy way out. I have heard individuals refer to “God” as they understand Him as a doorknob, a tree, the ocean or some other nonsensical thing or object.

Nonsense: n. 1. That which is without good sense; meaningless or ridiculous language. 2. Things of no importance.

To believe that “God” can be anything relegates god to being nothing in reality. “God is either everything or else He is nothing.” What is our choice to be? If you are struggling with the concept of a Power greater than yourself, you can start at a simpler level. To truly set ones feet on the path to living on the Spiritual Basis God must be at least this: Available, Intelligent and Loving and nothing less. Available: to live on the Spiritual Basis requires daily visits with God in prayer and meditation. How is this possible if He is far away, distant? Intelligent: He is the Creator. What more do we need to know? Loving: Here I would ask you to set aside any belief you may have of a vengeful or score keeper God. One of the keys to living on the Spiritual Basis is that “the realm of Heaven is roomy, all inclusive. Never exclusive or forbidding.” That God never brings trouble or sickness to our lives, that He loves us a thousand times more than we love our own children and like you, I love my children a lot. Additionally God doesn’t keep a tally sheet of our lives, We do, everything we have ever done or said is written on our heart, in our hand, our lives an open book to Him who has all knowledge and power; yet since He loves us unconditionally we are forgiven as soon as we ask. If we could only forgive ourselves so readily think how much trouble we could avoid. So, if you are struggling, start at a simpler level and God will heal what AILs you.

Love And Itchy Teeth

When we express love we express our true essence, God. Think of how you feel when you express love or when love is expressed to you. In those moments we are in communion with God, in conscious contact. …God is love; and he that dwells in love dwells in God, and God in him (1 John 4:16). A bedrock truth of living is a sufficient expression of love will erase any problem or difficulty. “Where there is fear there cannot be love. The best way to rid yourself of fear is to realize divine Love” for “Divine love never fails…” Are not all of our problems fears based? Are we not driven by the fear that we will either not receive something we think we need or lose something we have? Isn’t worry just a five letter word for fear?

The Great Carpenter taught that we cannot serve two masters, so where we place our focus, regardless and sometimes in spite of current circumstances, is the key. Are we focusing on the fear (the world) or on the spiritual (God)? “To realize God as Love is the remedy for fear.” Though word plays typically make my teeth itch, this one has some value: FEAR-False Evidence Appearing Real. God is either everything or else He is nothing, no middle ground, the thoughts we entertain habitually will be expressed in our lives and the choice is always ours. What will we choose to express today, fear or faith? Remember “Where there is fear there cannot be love” that “There is no condition that enough Love will not heal.” By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one to another (John 13:35).

A Seven Day Diet For The New Year

The seven day mental diet is a lesson in reaping and sowing. In the garden of our thoughts, how careful are we with the crops we plant and nurture in our consciousness? One of the fundamental truths of being is the thoughts we entertain will outsource into our lives. Consider: What are you reading? Watching on television? What topics do you consistently chat with friends and family about? What thoughts do you dwell on in private? These things comprise the food we feed our consciousness.

Day One: Be aware of the thoughts you entertain and the “food” you feed your mind. Be conscious in the moment. Keep notes if it helps, no extra points for spelling or correct punctuation. DO NOT tell anyone that you are on a diet, to do so guarantees failure. If the idea of doing this makes you cringe, then don’t. You are not ready. Just file it away and when ready, this wonderful tool of freedom will be available.

Our Perfection Realized

        Ever bowl a perfect game? Pitch a perfect game? Have 13 tricks no trump in Bridge? How about 21 in blackjack? A spade Royal Flush? When we start cataloging “perfection” it is a pretty short list all things considered, but what of spiritual perfection? Many religions hang their collective spiritual hats on an imperfect dogma of perfection; that we are imperfect at birth and though we should strive for perfection we will always fall short, requiring leadership and earthly direction from others for our ultimate salvation. To be clear: Religion and religious teaching and guidance have been indispensable in mankind’s climb up the ladder of Spiritual consciousness, but just as the student who must eventually graduate and take their place in the world, building on what they have learned by turning knowledge into demonstration, so must each of us in our relationship with Our Father.

      Just as families have difficulties from time to time, usually rooted in misunderstanding, intercession of a professional can be helpful to work through an issue, to provide fresh perspective. In the final analysis however the real work takes place between the family members, the professional merely an aid. Just as in the secular, spiritually we make use of what religion and spiritual teachers provide and are quick to see where they are right, but we must never lose sight of the true nature of our relationship with the Divine and the ultimate responsibility in raising our consciousness lies with each of us.

      By a wholehearted reliance on A Power Greater Than Ourselves, though none of us will ever be perfect in faith for fear is a powerful foe and the true adversary, perfection comes into view. As our awareness grows, coupled with demonstration, our willingness to pray demonstrates the perfection in seeking, so by consistently relying on the infinite rather than the finite through prayer, our individual consciousness rises, as does all of mankind’s, for everything and everyone are connected in Spirit.  So once again, in ultimate truth, Let there be peace and let it begin with me.

Cloudy Days

To show mercy to those in pain, whether physical or emotional, is of course a quality to be cultivated. But how merciful are our thoughts? It is the secret place the Great Teacher is really speaking too with the lesson: Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy (Matthew 7:1-5). To help but hold contempt in our heart for anyone, demonstrates having missed the point entirely. Having embraced Living on the Spiritual Basis does not mean we ignore the contemptible acts of others, but we must not confuse the act with the actor. In truth we recognize them, praying for the individuals consciousness to be raised and in meditation seek to improve conditions. Their acts will be addressed by the proper appointed secular authority if applicable and spiritually we are all ultimately responsible for our own demonstration, reaping what we have sown. A more seductive form of contempt is when we decide that anyone is beyond the pale, incapable of growth or spiritual understanding for any reason. The most spiritually handicapped individual’s life will improve when we shine the sunlight of the spirit, to the best of our ability at the time, on them. Sometimes the change in condition will be obvious, often however it will not be and that is none of our business anyway. What matters is our demonstration, for by our action we have raised not only our consciousness and the consciousness of those around us, but the entire world.

 Being merciful toward others is laudable, but what of the mercy we fail to show ourselves? Do you mentally (or worse, out loud) chastise yourself when a mistake is made or when some negative or objectionable thought floats through your mind? We all make mistakes and curious thoughts float up in everyone’s consciousness, so we must put away the mental cat of nine tails and demonstrate mercy in our own house (consciousness). God, Our Father, wants all His children to be: happy, joyous and free. So we stop berating ourselves and thank God that by knowing Him better we can learn from our mistakes and when those curious negative thoughts seem to appear from nowhere we can turn to Him in prayer, ask if there is anything to be learned (sometimes there is, but not always, often a cloudy day is just a cloudy day) and move on. Under no pretense do we engage in a hunt for the cause of the thought, attempting to root out it’s location in the psyche. To do so only opens us to the deadly trap of morbid reflection and in the ancient cartographer’s lexicon, there be dragons. If there is something to be known or learned, God will make it abundantly clear, so ask Him; but don’t go looking for dragons.

Beyond The Flesh

Do you know of anyone who remembers the Gettysburg Address because they were there? How about Washington crossing the Delaware? No? Of course not. This flesh we inhabit will one day fail. No amount of money, resources, exercise or just plain “good living” will alter that. This truth raises the eternal question, am I this body or something more? Living on the Spiritual Basis the answer is clear: We are Spiritual beings experiencing the human condition, not Human beings in search of the spiritual. The spark of consciousness that is unique to us is timeless, was never born and will never die; has always been and always will be. To attempt to grow from without, change the consciousness by artifice only lasts as long as outer conditions remain unchanged, however life has taught us that outer conditions are forever changing. A glance in the mirror or at our investments should provide any further proof required. Lasting change only comes from within, within our consciousness. By raising our consciousness through prayer we effect  permanent change beyond the vagaries of this flesh, secular living and thinking. So our job, the only real task in this life, is too practice the Presence of God every day in every area, with everyone, to fully forgive all who have trespassed against us, to hold fast to the truth that the only aspect that translates from this life is our raised consciousness and the only universal measurement of our time here: how much love did we give away, unconditionally.  

WILLING TO GO TO ANY LENGTHS?

Living on the Spiritual Basis, the basis of trusting and relying upon God, it would be foolish not to think of what the full impact of this means in our lives, or if you prefer to think from the end. Having been raised with or exposed to certain depictions of God, many of them rather frightening, and now being asked to surrender to Him might/probably/should give us pause. One concept that had always troubled me was, God loves you, but if you commit certain acts, you are damned for all eternity, seemed a little harsh. Eternity is an awful long time; a pretty high price for acts committed in the course of a life that balanced against eternity would amount to less than an eye blink in time. Of course there were others, but the answer was the same for all.

As our consciousness rises, it becomes clear that many of the scariest aspects of God are human constructs, though possibly based in some scripture they require some rather interesting interpretations of very selective passages, while typically ignoring others that are contradictory or superseding newer teachings or interpretations. Today we do not argue with or contradict those who hold on to a punishing, rigid concept of God, a demonstration in love a much more powerful persuader, since we each walk our own path, ultimately standing for the issues of our heart. I believe, and believe this holds true for all, that God is “Our Father” and wants all His children to be Happy, Joyous and Free, as any loving parent would. That we are forgiven as soon as we ask as long as we walk the way we talk (much easier said than done). No sin so grievous that if we mean business, God will restore us to sanity, a demonstration of true grace (to be clear: grace does not necessarily erase the earthly consequences of our actions, it does however provide us with the strength and courage to face them). The realm of Heaven being roomy, all-inclusive, never exclusive or forbidding, is open to all who earnestly seek, regardless of present conditions or circumstances. All that is required is an open heart, an open mind and the willingness to go to any lengths for a spiritual awakening.

THE GOLDEN RULE

  “Treating all in the same manner we wish to be treated in.” If, for any reason, we can justify treating anyone in a manner we would find objectionable if that same treatment were visited upon us, we are wrong and have placed ourselves in conflict with the Spiritual Basis of Living. Period. 100% of the time. Living on the Spiritual Basis our consciousness has risen. Today we look upon all as children of the Creator, possessing the spark of the divine, equal. This is the Golden Rule, we all reap as we sow, by denigrating or objectifying anyone for any reason the reward is clear, the consequences spiritually assured. Living at levels of raised consciousness, we recognize this, salute the divine within all with prayer, recognizing that pain is the only instrument sharp enough to cut away the excess of self. To be clear: on the surface, many appear to skirt this truth, living seemingly at odds with Divine truth and prospering. Death is the great equalizer, no one immune. At the moment of translation whom would you rather be, the individual who caused suffering and pain for pleasure and/or profit or the person who stood firm in faith? Consider the words of Victor Frankl "We have come to know man as he really is. After all, man is that being who invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those gas chambers upright, with the Lord's Prayer or the Shema Yisrael on his lips."

The Golden Rule entreats us to demonstrate the same love, tolerance, kindness and patience we wish to know, to all, regardless of circumstance, for we are truly children of eternity.

A DAUNTING TASK

Want a daunting task; try tackling eternity and death in four to five hundred words. Let me know how I do. Having worked with many approaching the transition, typically most folks have given it some thought, but usually have kept the subject at arms length for obvious reasons. Remind you of anyone? A wise man said centuries ago that the first true step in enlightenment is when we embrace our own mortality.

Where were you before you were conceived? One moment there was no you, and then there was. In that single cell, the fertilized egg, everything about you was there: your eye color, the shape of your fingernails, hair color, final height, sex, your blueprint of freckles, everything that makes the physical you, all in a point of protoplasm so small as to be invisible to the naked eye, pretty amazing. Then you began to grow and nine months (give or take) later you made your appearance on the world stage. Fast forward a few decades and we arrive at another seminal moment in life, when the flesh fails. Where’d you go? Consider: Before you were born you were nowhere in flesh. You are born, and now you are now here. You die and you are nowhere again. Same word, just a little different spacing: no where to now here to no where again in the flesh. (Tip of the hat to Wayne Dyer, though I may have thought it, he said it very clearly and on point.)

In truth we have always been “here”, part of, connected to the Source, the flesh a tool, a conveyance for our eternal consciousness. We didn’t arrive from anywhere and we don’t go anywhere. Our birthday and death day are points on a relatively meaningless calendar, since God and our consciousness are eternal. Living on the Spiritual Basis we spend this life applying spiritual truth and understanding to everything in our lives to the best of our awareness at the time since our awakening is an ongoing process. In so doing the answers to the eternal questions come if we are diligent. So don’t concern yourself with what is on the other side of the line, for the line really is immaterial, for death waits for all men but waits on no man.  Keep your eyes and thoughts on today’s demonstrations and the morrow will take care of its self. In living this way we will approach the transition in peace, embracing the change, bidding farewell to the limitations of flesh, going nowhere, being here now, just in a different and altered consciousness.

BATTLE PLANS AND SERENITY (surrendering to win)

Demonstration versus theory. Generals create battle plans, their theory on how the battle should be fought and won. Politicians have theories on everything, usually with little or no actual experience to balance their opinion. Economists are quick to theorize, usually poorly. Meteorologists and climatologists put forth theories daily, calling them forecasts, and we have all experienced their accuracy. Although we don’t usually think of it in this way, we all have theories about everything in our lives. Raising children, dealing with in-laws, how to get a job, keep a job, get ahead at work, diet, why our team is doing well/poorly etc. When we chat about the reasons why something happened, or didn’t, what we think is going to happen or some action to take, we are floating theories. Theories based on experience typically have value, while theories based on no more than wishful thinking are hot air until implemented, the consequences realized, truth demonstrated. Truth is never subjective and often stark in its reality. If the local weather prognosticators get it wrong, the truth is typically no more painful than a ruined picnic or carrying an umbrella on a sunny day. General’s theories, battle plans, which go badly, can result not only in death but in unintended reshaping of the map. Economists theories should be placed in the newspaper next to horoscopes, unfortunately decisions that affect everyone are based on their theories, were if my horoscope is wrong it won’t possibly put thousands of people out of work or raise taxes. Politicians and the price of demonstration for their theories? Examples can be found daily on the front page of any paper or leading the nightly news, the truth demonstrated.

The world will take care of it’s self, it always has. Man has been trying to bend it to his will forever with little success. Focus on the only thing that can truly change the world for the better, your spiritual life, your connection to the miraculous. Meditate and pray regularly, don’t struggle, pray with a feather and approach meditation with joy and excitement. If this is a problem, than pray on it! A good beginning meditation is contemplating patience, tolerance, kindliness and love in your life and towards the whole planet. Concerned about praying in the right way? Than ask to be shown, in prayer, how to pray correctly. Keep it simple. Read, every day, for a few minutes any book that raises your consciousness. Stop theorizing about truth and practice it, remembering to be as gentle with yourself as you are with a newborn and surrender those battle plans, for we have ceased fighting everyone and everything, we have to.